I return months later having frankly forgotten all about neocities and this site yet again. I realise nobody really knows about this site let alone reads it and yet I find the idea of having written something that is simply out in the ether quite interesting. That being said the real question is whether I have anything worth saying at all, I have spent most of my time since starting this site swamped in schoolwork/university work reading all these interesting papers and yet when it comes to presenting my own thoughts I struggle.
I think that (despite how it seems by even having this page) I simply do not enjoy talking about myself - and when I do end up doing talking about myself it's in this odd and roundabout way which just makes things unclear and frankly insane sounding, as you can likely tell already. Anyway I think I have rambled enough about it all that if I can think of anything else to say it will have to come in a later entry.
To get to what I actually wanted to talk about, I would like to focus more on this site - at least until it is operational and is able to work without too much faffing around. After that it should be easier to just pop back every now and again when I have something fun to share, rather than coming back to mountains of unfinished projects and half written code. I simply need to be able to make the time each week to pick away at these concerns and then maybe I'll finally get to a point where the site feels polished if not completed. But alas that is all distant future planning because (as always) I am utterly and completely swamped with work to the point where the fact that I'm even updating this silly little page is quite irresponsible.
Since first starting this site (in 2023 !) it has undergone an awful lot of chnages but frankly so have I so perhaps it is not so ridiculous that this has remained a quite constant throughout it all, a kind of confusing little pet project which is brought back and morphs and chnages as I change. I have met entirely new friends, moved across the world, graduated from school, applied, been accepted, started, and finished my first year of university and that is only the broad strokes. I think with so much change in my life it would be flawed to expect this site to stay as a capsule of what it was once meant to be, and so it's goal transforms as I do and that is an interesting and nice feeling.
I think we often find ourselves changing as people much more often than the institutions around us do, which is part of why I think having spaces like this which can evolve and change over time at the your own discression is important. I know what everyone is going to say 'well instagram does that too' and 'what about twitter?' and while I agree they can be used in this way I worry about handing over years of information and conversations to these companies which have proven time and time again they are entirely focused on profit and are entirely willing to delete or sell your memories the second it makes them more money than saving it.
Anyway I feel the need to apologise for this non-structured ramble but I will refrain because I need to get over this compulsive need to apologise when sharing my thoughts, and if anywhere is a good place to start here is probably best considering it puts nobody out as frankly I doubt anyone will be reading this. But if you are, thank you for your attention and I will try to be more regular with these silly little updates, slán go fóill.
